


When You're Sixty-five

by The Hag (hagsrus)



Category: The Professionals
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-07-21
Updated: 2010-07-21
Packaged: 2017-10-10 17:34:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 389
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/102317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hagsrus/pseuds/The%20Hag
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for the Tea and Swiss Roll  Weekly Obbo Challenge #54(A): Smirk and Fester</p><p>July 2010</p>
            </blockquote>





	When You're Sixty-five

"What are you smirking about?" Bodie demanded.

Doyle put down his copy of the Guardian. "Just found the perfect pressie for your birthday."

"Don't remind me." Bodie shuddered and turned back to the computer.

"Well, I got through mine, didn't I? Sixty-five, it's young these days."

"Yeah, you sound just like a little kid when you're complaining about your arthritis. So what's this amazing gift then? A guaranteed hair restorer? Lifetime supply of Viagra?"

"Viagra? Saltpetre, more like. You get randier now than -- "

"All right, all right. At least it keeps our poor old prostates from festering. So what is it, then?"

"Bring up the Guardian site. Today's books."

"I leave that lefty rubbish to you, mate. Wit and Wisdom of Karl Marx, is it?"

"Made easy for infant minds, just the thing. No, go on."

Grudgingly Bodie started typing. "G-R-A-U-N-I-A-D..."

"Moron, it's -- "

"It brings up the Guardian link third on Google. All right. 20 July 2010. Here, the Yanks are letting Conrad Black out of clink."

"That sodding crook!"

"White House shifts Afghanistan strategy towards talks with Taliban -- lots of bleedin' luck. David Cameron -- "

Doyle made a retching sound.

"Come on, fair's fair. Time the natural ruling class had a go at sorting out the mess your lot made."

Doyle threw a cushion at his head.

"Violence solves it all, right?"

"Books. Or all you're getting is a third-hand toothbrush."

"Books, books.... Tim Parks... unpublished Kafka manuscripts - those should be good for a giggle -- "

"Down a bit."

"Fucking hell!"

"Yeah."

"Sachin Tendulkar's blood used to prepare special edition of his memoirs," Bodie read in awed tones. "De luxe version of the Tendulkar Opus, costing £49,000, features cricketer's blood mixed into paper pulp... gold leaf... 852 pages... DNA profile..."

"There's a cheaper version without the blood," Doyle said. "Only about two thousand quid. You should have kept up the cricket, sunshine."

Bodie leaned back, shaking his head. "You know, it's a good thing that artist, wossname, Serrano wasn't in on the design. Blood's one thing, but -- "

Doyle uttered a crack of laughter. "That would really be taking the piss!"

"Two thousand quid's worth of Swiss rolls would do. The ones with chocolate covering."

"You're going to be lucky if you make it to sixty-six, all that rubbish you eat."

"Miss me, would you?"

Doyle grinned. "Only like pissing."


End file.
